Thursday, April 10, 2008

Blind To Misogyny

I love my partner, CR/LF. But he's a man.

For the past five years, we've agreed on most things political, including elections, and enjoyed debating ~ both others and one another the few times we've disagreed. But this year it's a struggle.

He's decidedly Barack; I'm decidedly Hillary. While I'm really, really certain neither of us is so invested in "our candidate" that should the other win the Dem's nod we'd not be so stupid as to shoot ourselves & our country in the foot by voting anything but the Democratic ticket, just talking about the election this year is difficult.

Primarily, my belief in Hillary is because she's put more concrete information out-there about her ideas, her platform, her direction, than Barack has. Sure, "Hope" and "Our Moment Is Now" are magnificent concepts. But being president requires action, our country needs a framework, and I as a voter need more than a simple philosophy, however grand, to convince me that he can do what needs to be done.

Pragmatic issues aside (which is such an odd expression to use when discussion a presidential election, that I'm tempted to backspace it all...), the past few months have really set the bit between this horse's teeth. And the fundamental reason for that is the gender judging ~ and let's face it, bashing ~ that Hillary is enduring.

And that's something CR/LF is reluctant to discuss.

As smart, sensitive and educated as this good man is, he still has difficulty really understanding the female experience. That's how insidious misogyny is in our culture; men just can't see it. And when it's pointed out, it makes them uncomfortable & defensive. "Hey, not all men say/think/do that... I don't!"

As if that's what I am saying when I point out the crap; as if I am blaming him personally.

Then there's the, "If it's not everyone, then don't worry about it," and the looks that say, "Oh, gawd, there she goes again..." as if I'm "one of those foaming at the mouth feminists" because I won't just sit there silently and take it.

Sure, lots of this can (& does) apply to the issue of race. But there's one big difference with this argument in this election year...

While folks are freely dishing about Hillary's clothes, faulting her for her "female traits" & "feminine wiles" (such as her tears), and equally mocking her for being a "robot" or "monster" when she doesn't display enough of what they perceive to be "feminine traits"; no one is applying such stupid stereotypes, on such a scale, regarding Barack's race.

Has film footage of Barack eating watermelon & fried chicken been discussed (ad nauseam) as "real" or a "campaign ploy"? No one at the news networks would find it acceptable to discuss his demeanor in terms of a "song and dance man" or some other stupid, racist historical role which blacks have been forced to play. No one is allowed to couch Barack's set-backs in terms of "being lynched" by his opponent.

No one would stand for such horrid stereotypes when it comes to race ~ and the few times idiots have gone too close, they've been slapped down. Thankfully we won't tolerate such ignorance and malice when it comes to race.

But it's apparently fine to talk about Hillary in terms of her gender.

As the video shows, it's just dandy to paint Hillary as just another uppity breeder who needs to be put in her place.

It still is just fine to denigrate, belittle & mock based on gender. And as the gender so disparaged and limited, I'm enraged.

Enraged enough to vote my gender ~ even more than before.

And if CR/LF doesn't agree, doesn't want to vote for Hillary for other reasons, that's fine; but he's darn well better start to see what's going on.

Because this misogyny-blindness is making me want to poke people's eyes out.

(Link to video found via Amber Rhea, who found it at Random Babble, etc. etc.)

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Anonymous ouyangdan said...

thanks for the trackback!

and i really like what you wrote here.

i (rarely) have the same problem w/ my boyfriend/partner whatever it is we call e/o this week. he is wonderful, but every once in a while he thinks i am looking for misogyny under every rock.

and then you can see the comments on my thread there...i feel like i argue in circles w/ people, and that when gender and sexism come up that they are just talking over me and not bothering to read what i have written.

but worse are if you follow my links back to Shakesville, and see the discussions going on there. it floors me that people who consider themselves "progressive" think that we should just 'rise above' the crap thrown our way.

or that we are making a bigger deal out of it than it is.

or we are playing the gender card.

or we are ignoring that teh menz have these problems too.

anyway, enough babble from me, thanks for linking back to me. this video made me blub like it was no body's business.

April 10, 2008 11:56 PM  
Blogger GeekLove08 said...

Thank you for taking the time to create a blog post on the video "Mad as Hell/Bitch".

The video was created by two grassroots supporters who met online, IndyRobin and GeekLove08. It took 4 weeks to create the video as we were collaborating via e-mail and we had a lot of material to work with. Both of us are fairly new to YouTube-- I started to create videos in February and this was IndyRobin's first video.

We believe that the message of misogyny, as well as the character assassination of Hillary Clinton, by the media is an important one. We are "mad as hell" that television has become what Edward R. Murrow had warned about in 1958 when he said "This instrument can teach, it can illuminate; yes, and it can even inspire. But it can do so only to the extent that humans are determined to use it to those ends. Otherwise it is merely wires and lights in a box."

Thanks to people like you, the video has gone "viral" spreading through the internet, and perhaps inspiring people to speak out against the media.

If you and/or your readers have the opportunity, we would appreciate it very much if you could go to the original video post on YouTube and RATE the video, post a COMMENT on the video, and FAVORITE the video. These actions will help the video earn YouTube "honors" which may help further promote the video online. (You can get to the YouTube site for the video by double clicking the video on your blog.)

Thanks again for your post.


(P.S. The video is NOT an anti-Obama video, but rather a video against the media bias. However, for those who do support Hillary Clinton, a donation to her campaign, for those who can afford it, would be great. There is a donation link on YouTube. The donation link appears when you click "More info" that appears next to the video information "Added: April 06, 2008". Thanks.

April 16, 2008 5:41 AM  

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